i love being in ibiza. their hotels are much more receptive to walking around naked in the lobby than our american ones.
the only human I can compare her to is rosie o'donnell.
Yeah, all the sudden I heard a loud "ding" and realized I had been passed out on the dorm elevator for about an hour....
Just did lines off your face, congrats on getting in the magazine bro
Well it looked like you were having a fucking apiphany sitting at the toilet with a t shirt around your head
You picked up her frozen vom puddle and threw it like a frisbee.
Is it cheating if its a threesome? This is more like a party game than infidelity.
Why do I love Florida? Because I just quit my job because it's too pretty a day to go to work and I'm going to the beach to eat seafood and drink beer.
he looks SO much like Drake, I feel like an extreme groupie every time we have sex.
btw you left your chapstick on the nightstand and bruises on my body...
gifts from me to you. you're welcome.
Well my summer started by me waking up in a tube on the side of the pond this morning with 2 of my friends. So that's good..
What if he stabs me in the back, mid-orgasm, as I sit on his face? It'd be a miraculous way to go but that's not the point
He sent me a dick pic from work, but I could see all the pizzas in the background. Now I'm just hungry.
I answered the booty call in my Trophy Wife cutoff and my ex-boyfriends sweatpants with a bottle of jager.
and how was that received?
That sounds good. I'd totally blow you somewhere quick but im not in the frame of mind to think of a place
Be outside in 5
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