i mean i'm ok with bufu but if i'm gonna do it it needs to be a mutual agreement, and there are steps that need to be taken. you don't just go OOPS we're doing it now
He kept his baseball cap on when he went down on me...
when he put a condom on for a handjob cuz he didn't want to "blow his load in the car" i started to question my choice in guys..
I was just hoping for a dick worthy of his established age.
When he wears his hair down and sandals, he looks like Jesus. A Jesus I would fuck.
That's not what Jesus is for
I made my own utility belt like Batman. It has a cup holder for my beer, cell phone holder, a little pocket for condoms, and a sewing kit just in case.
You're not stopping till I see you on the ground trying to hold on to shit
I swear she looks like a sloth.... I'll toss a coin...
Why is there a muffler in the livingroom?
First, I just want to say that I had nothing to do with it. Second, how good is your car insurance?
Of course I understand. Thou shalt never turn down a free meal or drink. It's one of the commandments of being a girl.
Explaining that I bought them at a strip club gift shop with my friend didnt make the furry handcuffs seem less weird
You seemed underwhelmed by my smooth, smooth ass
It was the needle in the haystack of teary, unpleasant handjobs.
I JUST BROKE A NAIL MASTURBATING. WTF I could even enjoy my orgasm bc now I'm gonna have to spend $50 on my nails.
i found you passed out on the floor with a half-eaten pie. i figured youd be the last person to care if i went and banged your sister
Randomize
