to do: lose virginity to hamster dance
I walked in on my roommate finishing watching something on his computer. There was cum all over his screen. He awkwardly said hi and pulled up his pants.
We'll make it into fun. If I can make wii bowling into a drinking game, I can make studying spanish into a sex game.
when i was alone, his dick was there for me...
Just checked my recent transactions online. Between the hours of 1 and 3am on September 30th, I went to 7/11 4 times. Unacceptable.
I didn't take her seriously until she snorted that ramen noodle flavor packet...
I will also be strapping forties to the puppies.
4 girls bringing me taco bell. this is what dreams are made of.
I brought some guy back to have cheese whiz with me. Then sent him home
Was he satisfied?
No, and very vocal about it.
a guy just walked up to us....drank the rest of my beer....and said sorry for my loss before walking away.
we played animal sounds and i linked arms with her cuz we were both cats....fate and my community college drama teacher have chosen my one night stand
He sent me a selfie with his cat. He has found a way to my heart. And pants.
Good, be his mentor. Like a tiny gay Yoda.
My vagina needs a break, I had to ice it with a beer bottle last night.
there is such a gross feeling of satisfaction when the married guy i used to hook up with likes my facebook status.
Randomize
