I mean roof. it goes up. its important day. you should recongziw it.
You're drunk. Make complete sentences.
It's not luke its my birthday or anything. Mike, understand.
I just don't have the heart to tell my mom you peed in our washer machine last night.
Well he has a girlfriend. So I told him that I wanted to have sex way more than I wanted to be a decent human being.
I told them the reason I passed out was because of "heat exhaustion." Not from showing up drunk. Good thing this is Arizona.
My main goal for tomorrow night is to make it back into my own bed
I would of joined had I not blacked out last night and ran around naked breaking things till 4 am
I'm at a restaurant. I am NOT about to discuss my asshole over the phone.
somebody went from crying while watching Full House, to a full on emotional raging bull...I love this time of the month
I have a pair of clean panties in my purse. This is having your life together.
HE'S LIKE A GREEK GOD BUT HE'S FROM BOSTON. HE'S A BOSTON GOD
pray to him
I WANNA PRAY ON HIS DICK
I was really proud of me too last night! Found a discarded hamburger that I have no memory of at the foot of the bed. Instead of a Dude. I'm really growing as a person
Tim is a child that you physically can't love because he makes it hard for you to even find anything redeeming about him so you debate leaving him forever at the gas station.
I'm a grown ass woman. Treat me like one. Fuckboy
It was ok until his mom walked in and asked if he turned on the crock-pot...
I opened the door, threw up on the street, wiped my mouth and flashed a thumbs up to all of the cars behind us and kept on driving
Randomize
