they just started talking about wanting to bang stephanie tanner from full house
We better get laid next semester cause I prayed hard
I even walked 30 feet with my eyes closed from two love rocks so that we get some cock
that sweater is a total boner killer. you might as well be wearing a wedding dress.
Why have they been driving around the block for the past 30 min?
He told her it was international road head day.
you have no idea the dirty thing i want to do to your blad spot. please wear my vagina as a hat.
while she was riding me, she looked at me and said "this is why mom told me learning how to ride a horse would be important for my future"
We're bowling witha frozen turkey in the hallway...ur missing out
I drank butter last night, who am I to judge?
Took me 10 minutes of oral to finally get him hard for like 30 seconds of sex until he came and passed out. Def not worth the ROI.
Funny, 'cause his story is it went great. He faked passing out so he wouldn't have to do anything in return.
The best of us have puked in our office garbage cans. I just hope yours wasn't the metal mesh kind...and bagless like mine. Rock n roll office manager.
Does the term "on fleek" apply to dicks or just eyebrows?
TELL HER ABOUT THE GODDAMNED MOTHERFUCKING POTATOES
just call my name and ill be there, if we are puking, beating up bitches, or pickin up men, OR avoiding wierd men, so many situations require a wingman
I just told the bartender to “give me something that will murder me”
PSA Do not blow dry your junk.
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