I told him it tasted like his mom..needless to say we were asked to leave.
i want to bang the Snorg tees girl.. shes always smiling ;)
AHHHH!!! note to self never google image chastity belt omfg
the point i decided it was time to leave was when i was on the floor of the bar, after taking her down with me, and a table.
I already brushed my teeth, and it's not even noon yet. Today's going to be a productive day.
Why is there a school picture of an 8 year old boy in my pocket...?
Right, well, that begs the question of where did you get the whip, why are you using it, and why don't you carry one around more often?
...Just between you and me I just did Olympic grade ribbon dancing with toilet paper in the bar bathroom.
Overall win. We all know who got to sleep on the concrete outside of Denny's with you.
I just had a great idea for an etsy shop. Sell all the shit bitches leave from one nighters
Okay so how much boob would you consider inappropriate for smart casual?
So I woke up this morning to find my laptop open, with a google search for "where to buy marble", and a hungover naked northern girl in my bed who told me that I claimed to be a sculptor last night and that I promised to sculpt a bust of her hands...
I would like you to know, a bag of cheese cubes just attacked me at work.
He's such a jerk. If only his penis was attached to someone else
my penis made a compromise with my morals
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