I literally ate my thanksgiving dinner while getting a lapdance. And honestly, after that, there is no other way.
I'm way too horny to be at work right now. I think it might be legally irresponsible to leave me alone with cucumbers.
i keep seeing random pieces of my outfit all around town.
Please get rnbert tn get chebk h'm in i'm no dead when he getr gome
i want to find a way to basically assault his face with my vagina.
Just paid a $5 cover at a bar I stumbled by so I could puke in a toilet and not in public.
Night. I'll wake u up at 6 with the unfinnished vodka bottle so be prepared young grasshoper. U have much to learn.
Idk. Last year there was an ice luge, glow in the dark jungle juice, and lots of naked people. I feel like I'll get pregnant just thinking about going to that party.
Hardcore start to spring break. Mike is wearing adult diapers because the only stop we are making is for gas.
Nah its cool some of my cousins have fucked the same girls and brought them on family vacations and everything.
When I say drunk I mean that in the process of filming a fratstar cooking show they threw a keg into the street where the police came to clean it up. now all they can say is "THE KEG GOT ARRESTED."
During your work shift I was either: a) stoned. b) high. c)stoned. or d) high.
Being single/not living at home sucks. All I want is someone I can force to pick up my pizza for me so I don't have to talk to anyone.
So worth it. Come over for bacon egg cheese vusquit later. 12. I slept with Jimmy? On my period? And told him he had mother issues? No tequila. Tequila bad.
This morning, I found 5 naked people in Steve's bed with post sex hair, and Steve fully clothed sleeping on the ground.
Randomize
