i wish i was a boy too so i knew what a blow job felt like
I ended up giving him head, i think it was mostly a defensive move so that he wouldn't discover i was wearing those onesy spanx
Just used your umbrella as a puke sheild. Thanks man.
I'll bring the barf blanket just in case.
He texted me for a bootycall at 2:00am so I rolled outta bed and shaved my legs but then he decided he wasn't coming over...he lost his bootycall privileges
This is one of those times where I really wish my vagina could tell me what happened last night.
So is there some kind of punch card you and I get to use every time we fuck a chick with a cast?
Oh my God, that is a gorgeous man. And I wasn't even gay until five minutes ago.
Where are you? I hear fireworks and you've gone missing. I'm sure that is not coincidence.
he said he'd buy me TWO burritos if I took my shirt off
I piss off the neighbors just so I can have someone to compete with.
She was rubbing her face on the carpet, she was high.
I saw a groundgog last night outside my back door. I now have a new wedding gift idea.
We get drunk and make out in different places. Is that what love is?
I'm in the woods tripping balls the water is rising why don't you answer me
Randomize
