yo i have your phone
... oh so you probably won't get this message
Oh, and no balcony sex...trust me.
We're trying to leave but amy's hitting on the guy who mans the nacho cart
Counseling BFF to break up with her BF. We will get that 3-way
dude, i turned on the light and asked if they were ok and they STILL didn't stop. Most determined sex EVER.
You carried me up the stairs after I told you not to. And what did you tell me? "Let me test my strengths."
True idk how my parents didn't know I was blackout. I ate like 4 pieces of cheesecake and showed my cousins my boobs
My tweets this weekend consisted of me telling every bar I went to that they were my favorite valentine. I've never felt like more of an alcoholic
we're drinking bellinis i mean god's titty nectar
I'm questioning my decision to swallow this morning while my stomach was in hangover mode
I told him I was on my period but he says "I'm a doctor, you think I can't handle blood?" And just went for it. Jackpot
I’ve slept with a Senior, a Freshman and a Junior so far. I’m a Sophomore away from hitting for the cycle
Birthday wine tasting got super shambly super quickly. I am covered in cuts/bruises/terrible life decisions.
Did I tell you I drunk fucked my one roommate last week
Uh no
I remember her making the first martini but the rest of the weekend is a blur of vodka, high heels and sex toys.
First time being used by a cougar. Definitely okay with it
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