My RA just tried to write me up for having sex too loudly during quiet hours.
is it bad that i have made the decision to never travel to vienna simply because of that transvestite that won the bachelor?
dont start drinking without me
We haven't even started dating yet but I already decided I'm going to cheat on her
I cannot believe how calm you were last night about telling Katie she was on fire.
found out the liquor store price matches. thus begins senior year of college
Just saw a dude hanging out a window upside down chugging a 60 of vodka. This weekend is big for everyone I guess
I fell asleep with all the lights and heat on in the apartment with windows open, Earth Hour is lost on people like me.
I need to puke. I need a shower. I need rehab. I need to detox and puke. I feel like demons are inside of me.
Taco Bell. She just parked, got out of the car mid drive-thru, ran to the dumpsters, pissed, then ran back and drove up in the line.
No, your dick is problems. Anyone you fuck haunts us for the rest of the semester. If you need to get laid, I'll personally drive you out of state.
All I know is I want him to tie me up at least twice a week and I have an overwhelming urge to cook for him. Could this be love? I'm so confused....
Here you are just trying to masturbate and I'm talking to you like your an initiate for some secret society.
I woke up naked with a duck on my head. I think something went horribly wrong.
Also, why does our bed smell like mayonnaise?
You had blacked out Skype sex? Wow we live in the future
Randomize