sorry if i was weird last night, had weird deja vu that we had done that before, i mean with the peanut butter.
we had.
well that explains the rash. i dont think i should see you again.
how the fuck am i supposed to make breakfast with spaghettios and mustard
i may have used way too many innuedos last night. i scared him off. but really... how could i pass up "stimulus package" and "flacid economy." don't answer that.
everyone made a circle around them and startd chanting fight fight. they wernt fighting, they were dry humping
i just went to use the bathroom this morning and I couldn't because there was someone puking in every stall. i'm going to miss the dorms this summer
its not that he announces that he can deep throat a banana its the fact he knows he can and it makes me wonder how he found out
Someone asked me what I was drinking, I was drinking rum, but I was also eating starbursts so i told them "daiquiris"
The blackout version of me left a ransom note to the sober self. Somebody needs to control that guy
You had your dick do your apologizing for you last night. Apology accepted.
I have random bruises including my spine and visible bite marks on my neck. Thanksgiving car sex accomplished.
Why do you hate her?
She's dating the best penis that has ever entered my vagina.....
So his shoes are still here. And there are three contacts in a case. And a shirt on the bed. I've checked my dorm and he's not here. I'm so confused.
That's crazy. Wow that lady must be fucked up
Yeah I hope she's okay.
I'm still going to fuck her husband but I do hope she's okay.
All I remember is an overwhelming desire for chicken nuggets...
Yes, you pinned my brother to the floor by the throat and threatened to slaughter his family if he didn't drive to mcdonalds and get you some.
Stop inviting Kevin over. The dickless wonder started playing some strange Sci-FY music and speaking an alien language and the girls split.
Randomize
