The two bassists just totally made out. I NEED MENNA'S RIGHT now.
Omg. I just woke up in a room full of naked people
would you consider him our boss?
technically yes
then technically i slept with our boss
Prostitute standing on the corner thrusting at cars as they drive by. New marketing strategy?
you need to know that there is a kid here wearing an i mosh for Jesus shirt
when i got home i made myself toast with butter & put pasta on it. I know this cause it's all over my bed.
booty call hours are between 1:30-3:00 AM thurs-sat with the exception of major drinking holidays and election days. please try again
Just started taking liver support pills. Welcome to Senior year.
I told him I'd clean his cock if he ever sent my GF another text message. It was a horrific time for me to miss the l key on my iPhone.
Remember how he wouldn't sleep with me "out of respect"? Well, Mr. Respect just fingered me in a parking garage.
It just wouldn't be valentines day if i didn't invite 90% of the guys i've slept with to go to the strip club with me
Wow i don't think I've had to send this many texts apologizing for my behavior since high school...
When she saw "buy condoms" on my to do list she figured out pretty quick we were breaking up.
I remember being like "I can't hold both of you guy's hair back!" so I put headbands on each of you
Plan b and 5 hour enegery breakfast of a champion
Randomize
