hey can you give me head? jesse told me that you're really good
who is this?
jesse's little brother
try this...when you orgasm scream his address including city state and zip...
they just dont make restraining orders like they used to.
Y do pigs give u trufles on farmville? I WANT BACON YOU FUCKING PIG!
The worst part is I think my tongue cut his penis and now he wont talk to me.
swear to god some girl just crawled out of the washing machine. this is intense.
I NEED TO NOT REMEMBER THIS IN THE MORNING. He is our TEACHER.
You took a bar mat shot.
The Mole People would help. They are a kind, helpful people, the Mole People are.
Mole people?
Mole people
The party got hot, we all started raging, took off some clothes, someone threw me in the shower and we all kept raging. Nude Rager, I was there at the point of conception.
I should probably drink beer instead of rum today so I don't end up naked in my living room while I still have guest.
Nothing will stop me from making the title of my paper "The Great Political Cock Block." Absolutely nothing.
In Texas. Drank way too much wine. Puked in a gallon zip lock bag. Passed out at 445 with the ENTIRE family here. Got up at 745 in time for dinner. I made you proud!!!
Literally been in their house 5 minutes and I've projectile vomited all over the bathroom wall. The dog licked it up though so I think it's cool.
I have to charm this cab driver. Hold on.
Randomize
