it always starts out as a suggestion then three hours later I have cum in my eye.
You need to get here now. A drunk girl just stumbled into our apartment. shes laying on the floor by our door.
beer for lunch on the first day back to school.... too soon?
These guys are walking up and down the hallway yelling, "Yo, is this the floor with the unisex bathroom?"
Where can I buy a trophy for a Groupie Award?
She had sex with a merch guy. . . band guys make you groupies, Merch guys just means she's easy.
I wish straight boys touched me the way gay boys do.
well on a positive note i hear those vitamins you take while pregnant do wonders for your nails
The fish's death was accidental. We all said a few words at his funeral. Roomie wanted to play only the good die young as he swirled down the toilet bowl
Just had a shirt made that says "I'm sorry" going to wear it every sat and sun morning for the foreseeable future
You should know two things about me,,,1) I am highly sexual and 2) I am HIGHLY competitive so you telling me about how much sex you had with the other girl makes me say "challenge accepted"... you should hydrate.
masturbating on the freeway is more stressful than it sounds
Remind me to tell you all about the topless girl on the street who attempted to taze me.
Well let me fuck you while I make potatoes. It's every girls dream
Such a shame we didn't work out. We would've been a power couple producing NFL linemen :/
I have all the porn. Be there soon
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