At my boss' house at a bbq. Had a few beers. Taking a poop - there's no TP...this is my nightmare.
I just rolled a spliff on a dora the explorer tv tray. Preschool education meet afterschool special.
um. i met him on myspace...we text now, he lives down the street
Three 40's of Mickeys, is no excuse to be naked at Baskin Robins.
all of your clothes are in the front law. btw..sprinklers go on in 20 minutes
Exactly. So you're exempt under the "I can't just fuck her to make it go away" clause of 2010.
My 16 year old neighbor is throwing a rager cuz her parents are out of town and my brother and I are sitting on the porch listening to A) someone fuck on the trampoline B) a girl bawling about her parents finding out C) someone puking in what we think is the hot tub. And overall we take a shot everytime someone says "bra"
Her boobs take up a lot of room so God had to skimp on the brains
We have bigger issues at hand... Does anybody know someone in the kalamazoo area that is missing a pair of stilts ?
All I've done today is make sangria and wonder what the hell I'm doing with my life.
Today's hangover is probably top 3 of all time. Just threw up in an envelope. I'm on the ferry and didn't want to get out to puke over the side because I thought I might fall in the river.
You cannot tell me you don't have a problem while crying pantsless on a stranger's sofa bed.
I just want him to go down on me while I eat a burger. Is that too much to ask?
Dude on a beach in sicily and a blonde jesus just smoked us out and then tried to makeout with me I am never leaving this place
Well now you know... If you can get over the awkward... The dick is 10 min away.
Randomize
