I just had human shit waiting for me at the top of the escalator at Bowery. This is truly the Lord's day.
May the Lord look upon you in favor and give you pees.
Latenightwjoannablackberrywontletmespaceitknowsimdrunk
i must have dtf stamped on my forehead
why was he too nerdy?
he was a tetris block for halloween
for a minute I thought I needed to put on pants to go get a burrito, but then I remembered I'm in college
Im like a co-bf. he pays for her birthday and christmas, but i get all the action.
Awesome morning. I just met my boyfriend's wife, should I have shaken her hand or was the hug a tad over the top?
I'm having a staring contest with a raccoon.
Where the hell are you
He's winning.
well i mean she can't stop a weed based friendship...its like a trying to stop a bomb or a really fast train...
I need drugs. Hard drugs. Today. Not tomorrow. Today. Something relaxing.
Well ill be drunk so just come find me. Its like where in the world is Joey San Diego
See,its just the last time this situation happened I ended up hiding in a closet on my birthday
Man I can't wait till Thursday if strippers and beer are what you consider "research"
I helped you wax your vagina and you won't even get me Corn Nuts you fucking bitch?
So I fucked a guy with his mouth wired shut last night never thought id cross that off my imaginary bucket list
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