i just hope all the shady shit stops so i can let him into my pants
It's just like the Real World with babies
Ur keys r in ur purse. ur purse is on the couch. ur cigs r on ur front seat. u drank all ur wine. mollie took ur jkt bc u cockblocked her. and in case anyone asks, the saints won 31-17.
Its trashy in the best of ways. Like a stripper working to pay for college.
Adams eating in the shower, he says it's one of his favorite places to eat. Btw it's milanos he's eating, he says he loves italy too.
Yeah it was hard to find an opportunity while fucking him to say "oh the reason my lips taste so salty is because i blew your roomate 15 minutes ago"
Remeber when I drunkenly made out with him this summer while he was getting bitched at by his girlfriend on the phone? Yeah, neither do I. But I'm pretty sure that same thing happened again last night.
was this before of after we tobbganned into that tree?
I have glow sticks stuck to my boobs and a missed call from the 911. I'd say last night was a success.
Woke up and there was a kayak in the pool. Are you alive?
Give me a minute. I'm trying to buy moonshine from a railroad worker named "Cowboy."
I want a shirt that says, "I'm sorry for the things I said when it was Taco Tuesday"
Had sex in a blanket fort. How was your weekend?
I just swiped right for a guy on Tinder solely because it looked like he was holding Zoboomafoo
Yea. You locked yourself outside naked with nothing but running shoes and claimed it was a "parent trap thing."
Randomize
