I wanna put my baby in that!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Ew you even made it your fb status
Ppl probably think ur having a kid
I hope
Love having children with random chicks
For a day that started with shitting my pants, things turned out fairly well.
I found out that all you need to write a 12 page paper is adderall and twizzlers
Will you come get her? She's trying to get the pizza guy into the bathtub.
Let's go free Charlie Sheen and party with him
its not thanksgiving till you and grandpa shotgun beers out in the shed, and lose
I feel like I need to get rid of the black eyeliner, glitter, and tequila breath before I to that world poverty conference..
Just got my period. This just makes my beach escapade totally even that much more ok.
She had cheddar bay biscuits in her purse. Biscuits, Id and cash. I'm gonna marry her.
there's still three solo cups of your puke in my basement. so that needs to be solved at some point.
I gave him a bunch of ideas to use to spice up their sex life. Say what you will, I am the best 'other' woman ever!
I fell asleep on the floor again. i dont want help, just a pillow. its kind of nice down here.
At some point he mentioned fried rice and take out... I don't think we know how sexting works
On the shuttle bus from the Casino the driver refused to take us to the strip club so you said "let me off this bus or ill puke on you".
Like, yea, let's talk sexy but also...LOOK! I SAW A CAT!
Randomize
