I'm walking behind a man wearing a womans shirt, heels, mens pants and a baseball hat
When you want to head down the cleveland on Sunday?
What time do the bars open? I dont want to remember how bad theyre gonna lose
I woke up face first on my living room floor arms outstretched toward the christmas tree
I have the Lakers game on, but all I can think about is having sex with you. Not sure what you've done here.
in the event i get tipsy, my nipples are your responsibility
Don't do anything you wouldn't want to explain to paramedics
But that's half the fun of it
Ok, it is technically a gay bar but it's a total dive w/ strong drinks. The important thing is you can start drinking at 11:00 am without judgement
oh oh oh, and apparently you can bring in your own snacks. Some old dude just gave me cashews and cheetos.
Fyi: beer caps are stronger then bathroom counters
Ugh I miss culture and lesbians already
He just showed me how to break a chop stick with his ass.
Pretty sure the nurse said at one point I was in full restraints because I tried surfing my stretcher
Wow, I just woke up in this conference with the woman beside me staring at me. This is what happens when hungover people sit in warm rooms...
I ditched my one night stand in the hotel lobby. How did he add me on Snapchat?
We're gonna start a pole dancing competition or a bar fight. Stand by for results.
When we found you, you were half crying/half singing Taylor swift songs at 2am in the bathroom, and occasionally puking. I think I get "friend of the year" award just for putting up with your drunk ass all night.
Randomize
