I am good. I dancing. Drinking but dancing fine.
OMFG I JUST SAW SOMEONE GIVING SOMEONE ELSE ROAD HEAD AND THEY HIT A POTHOLE. my day has been officially made.
I just foul balled at work. I had taken off my coat too… had to go to the sink wash my hands then go back to the stall and pick up my coat. I hope the guy shitting in the stall next to me didn’t figure out what happened.
Uh, also, Rob told me he felt bad for choking you.
I'm quite proud of this turning point from one night stands to giving some guy a BJ to fix my car for free.
You only ask me to come over when your gf is gone, and thats usually at midnight to cook chicken salad and watch you pass out
listening to the two girls in the next stall finish a 40 and laugh at this guy they both fucked. they're calling him 'tulip dick'.
Judging by the crutches in the living room I take it you two are fine and we aren't going out tonight?
My Yoga instructor is playing the music from 'Requiem for a Dream' it makes me very reluctant to put my ass in the air
All I know is that I woke up in a soccer players' dorm, and he said that I kept telling him my mouth was a "net for his balls" last night at the bar..
I just want someone to shove bread from panera down my throat
I'm watching porn in spanish. Thats studying right?
He texted me at 3am that you cut your hand at the bar and were bleeding all over.
I woke up to a text thinking you bled out at a bar, turns out you got your butthole licked.
Yeah plus that night got so disgusting it's basically a repressed memory anyway
That’s true love. If they recognize a chocolate mold of your anus.
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