I finally had kitchen counter sex! i was so excited
You dont understand. she was my french AND spanish teacher. that's 2 kinds of freaky. i have to find her on facebook.
I just watched a blind kid buy from one of the vending machines on campus...guess there's nothing like a good surprise?
she has double-d's AND she knows what level Pidgeot evolves. don't tell me she's not a keeper
Just found out my mom tried to sue the birth control company when she got pregnant with me...love you too mom.
Do you know what's great about Canada?..... There will always be a Tim Hortons on my walk of shame route
I'm not really made for random hookups.. i'm like a swan.. i don't wanna have random swan sex. i just wanna have one swan hubby and fly around the world together and eat bread that people throw at us..
She's drunk as hell locked up I. The bathroom with my shoes where do I go from here
Well then sir I'll probably see you tomorrow after my class and at 3 with your clothes off. Sounds like a solid way to start the weekend to me
He drunkenly stumbled over to me and told me my "crotch looks spectacular tonight"..... i think this could work
How would your parents feel if we installed a sex swing?
Well he was mad because I chose tequila over him. He obviously doesn't understand that he will always be second to my first true love.
Last night when I blacked out, I ate Chef Boyardee. I never want to be that drunk ever, ever again.
He was like 120 lbs and 20 of that was penis
I learned tonight while in another country that no matter the nationality, men are disappointing in bed
Randomize
