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PS - I'm in bed with an 18 yr old-am I a cougar?
No - puma.
Our professor just said "No class today, go get stoned." A guy seriously walked over and hugged him.
at the hospital. he locked himself in the kitchen, said he was making beer batter shrimp. don't know if it's the mercury poisoning, alcohol poisoning or second degree burns they're holding him for, but i've got a pretty guess.
Srsly this has gone to far. Just broke my nose on the toilet. College bars.
FUCK... Pulled a chick from the bar went to her house passed out on the shitter. She lives in a house full of girls. They were making poop jokes as i left
Do you participate in Sunday morning booty calls?
Dammit! I didn't see this message, of course I do.
It could happen. I haven't creeped the rest of the guest list yet.
Just creeped. Everyone is a passable 7. Orgy is a go!
So I just realized I have three bananas, seven condoms, three lube packets, three tampons, and a shot glass in my bag but no pen #modelstudent
I wish you could just Google "people I've had sex with" and they would all just come up
We're listening to drake in the middle of the woods and smoking two joints at once...my life is complete.
I am in no place to make rational decisions, but right now i want you inside me
I put on a face mask and masturbated for an hour... my face now has a green tint
So then edible panties?
Jesus no he likes candy too much, I'd lose a lip
he said to "slap him" after he guessed the time correctly. i did.
Randomize
