? is bags or t-bags slang for scrotum?
jesus mom
This morning when you woke up you looked like one of the Wii Bowling people. I think it was the eyebrows combined with the sambuca
she needs to go suck a dildo, because she isn't worth a dick
i wanna anger bang this girl behind me at work. she never shuts up with her annoying voice. but her boobs are phenom.
Its midnight, he's burning water on the stove and keeps yelling at me and telling me not to burn myself.
looking back, maybe 11 flaming dr peppers was a little extreme
Dude, for your own safety, do not bring that chick home. I'm pretty sure you're going to find a marsupial pouch smuggling a fresh batch of herpes under that hoodie. Bail bail bail bail bail.
you picked up the vacuum cleaner at one point and said you we gonna beat the shit out of me with it. that was kinda funny
For u too. Could be years before u have a finger in ur ass
This place smells like bottom shelf liquor and broken dreams
Haha sweet. I'm being the Mad Hatter. I'll be drinking out of a tea cup all night. Or at least until I inevitably lose it, break it, or use it as a weapon.
He kept telling me that he didn't serve two tours in Iraq for my bitch ass to drink banana rum.
Preface: Im drunk. But i think id make a good assasin. That is all.
what are you getting to drink for new years?
well seeing as how i just got diagnosed with a uti, whatever we can mix with cranberry juice
How drunk were you? in an effort to seduce him, you demonstrated your lap dance skillz on his dog.
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