Today in psych we learned that you are a whore.
Me specifically?
Yep.
How can people commit suicide when things like bagels exist
Got hit on at a funeral service by cougar. I think I just got Reverse Will Ferrell'd.
Putting the night light in my bathroom cabinet was the best idea ever. Awesome for puking while light sensitive
I am currently google image searching dick piercings, trying to see what I'm getting myself into.
Moral of the story: If you're gonna throw a glass of wine in a guy's face, don't do it in your own kitchen.
I rode a bull tonight, There is absolutely no reason my dick is not in some chicks mouth
The dorm having an ice machine is their way of inviting us to make mixed drinks.
So I found where you barfed in my house. Just wanted to let you know that my cat barfed on the kitchen floor in a show of solidarity
please, i've had weekends with less dignity than this.
there's a photo set of like seven dicks covered in glitter....i don't know what to do
WHY IS FOOD SO DELICIOUS
BECAUSE SCIENCE
Is it possible to be drunk burnt? Like sun burnt but from drinking? Cus I think I that's what it feels like
TSA literally pulled two bottles of whiskey out of my bag. Once he saw the leopard print socks and the mickey mouse tank, he put it back in my bag and said "Have a fun trip, man."
I made him laugh his dick is mine
Randomize
