sometimes when you bring the thunder you get lost in the storm
I am going to fall madly in love with a ginger, marry the ginger and have lil ginger children running all around town. Oy
You shut your mouth
You need to come back and get me. This is not a jersey shore party and he is not dressed as Pauly D and I am about one shot away from hooking up with a real fist pumping Guido.
After the VIP Latina experience at the strip club last night, I am rooting for Mexico in this years World Cup.
hey, i'm all for honesty but let's not get carried away
You were passed out on the chair and when I asked you if you were okay you looked up and said "I'm fine, I was just pretending for a picture" then passed out again.
I want to do something romantic. Like gargle champagne before I put your dick in my mouth.
I can't live in this building much longer. People are starting to figure out that it's me making the weird sex noises.
Next sat night Titanic party. Bring your floaties, trashy necklaces, and a large lung capacity. This ship is going downnnnnnn.
I told him he was probably the first guy to get fucked while wearing Star Wars pyjamas.
Went into Walmart to get a pregnancy test. Came out with a beta fish and chocolate.
The guys who program Autocorrect have never seen a vagina in person
We are so on opposite sides of the boobs spectrum
Currently eating Dominos at the bar high as shit so that's how homework is going
We banged in his car behind the burrito place. Google Maps keeps asking me to rate my visit. 5/5, would cum again.
Randomize
