The answer is no. Its an illegal search n seizure!
i am officially better prepared for a hangover tomorrow than i was for christmas.
someone lit off fireworks while I puked in the street. I was like congratulating me for making it through homecoming.
I thought the one perk of the low caliber of men I've slept with thus far in my college career is that I would never run into them in the library. I've been here for ten minutes and we're on number three.
i had the all of mcdonalds chanting USA as he motorboated you
They just asked a fat guy to move to the other side of the plane. Send me a pic of your tits incase we crash
he got mad becuase i made more noise when he gave me a back massage then i do when we actually have sex
would it be mean if I put better with the lights off on my sex playlist just for my hook up with him?
The bartender seems to not like the DD's anymore. I'm sad
I'm at a new rock bottom. Malibu on ice at work because it's the only thing they've got and no mixers.
I've never heard "I will drown your mother in vanilla pudding" as an insult before, and then last night happened.
You asked for 4 things: your phone, your wallet, your keys and your denture. I stopped asking questions.
You're the only person I know who would go to New Jersey to give a blowjob and I have so much respect for you for it
He has a bear rug in his room. I'm going to ask if we can have sex on it. Wilderness sex.
You have ten minutes starting with this message to get here. Or I'm putting my clothes back on.
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