So someone put the baby mannequins in sex positions
Your sister got a Brazilian yesterday. It looks great
thanks for showing me a good time......and your penis a few times. Thanks especially for that.
we found you under the sink... we opened up the doors and you told us to go away because you were playing indian in the cupboard
He panicked, you ducked and I was coming off a 3 day coke binge. It was no one's shining moment.
honestly, i'm just crying in the kitchen naked and eating salsa
I feel like after that many guys, all of the water in your body is just replaced with pure jizz, honestly.
He got punched in the face, dropped his laptop down a flight of stairs, and broke his roommate's lava lamp, getting all the toxic lava goo everywhere. This is why we don't let him get drunk. And yet here we are.
I caught them hiding behind a car trying to have sex.
You know your high, when your chugging applesauce out of the jar with no utensils.
I don't know but someone, somewhere gave someone a hand job and someone else was pissed about it...
The highlight of my night was when you proclaimed that the man standing next to you smelt like grape medicine...
I think I may have just taught my whole hall how to give a good blow job. So this is college.
the fact that i came three times was completely negated by the fact that he high-fived himself after.
No no no, I want to share him with you. Think of it as me sharing a piece of delicious pie with you. He was THAT GOOD.
Randomize
