Well you will be happy to know that aaron carter hit on me
So when jo picked me up from the bar I kept apologizing and kept telling her "I'm just a wittle donut"
this is the second time this summer that a girl has called me a ken dol
you shouldn't let them see you without your pants on
I will show your tits more attention than Michael Jackson's death.
if i remember New Year's Eve then there is something seriously wrong.
what part of "i slept with our hot teacher" are you not excited about?!
the part where you beat me to him
fair enough.
Just pissed by glowstick light. Bad idea.
For looking exactly like her, she tasted less like her sister than I would've thought
WHY ARE YOU SMOKING WEED WHEN YOU JUST HAD A STROKE. AND MORE IMPORTANTLY WHY ARE YOU DOING IT WITHOUT ME.
I pulled out moves I did not even know I possessed, our fucking de-throned gods
Oh and I'm kind of in the library.
Waiting for the foreign guy who keeps staring to make his creepy move.
I hate you so much right now. You got us kicked out of my favorite bar because your drunk ass was hogging the Bluetooth jukebox and would play NOTHING but that goddamn skeleton song. IT'S NOT EVEN OCTOBER YET.
Spopky scrzy skeletonssz
I joined the mile high club last night. I ran a mile while high on coke. It was glorious
especially when i'm drunk. his dick might as well be made of cotton candy.
Update: pile o Coke party starting at approx 4 - 7 and going until 1ish to celebrate our founding fathers and love of cocaine and hatred of everyone\n
Randomize
