It really wasn't that bad. Well, it was pretty bad, but only in 3 second bursts.
the stripper made me go home becuz she had to take her kid to a birthday party in the morning
My "High Times" magazine came in today, as well as my girlfriend's new sex toys. We're calling in sick today.
my grandma just told me that size does matter, and don't let anyone tell you anything different.
there's only 1 girl at Mount St Mary that's a virgin. the Mary statue standing outside
You yelled "sharpie war!" then jammed it in her ear
I just had to download an app to edit pictures on my new phone. The things I do for sexting...
I think he's having people over to watch him get way too drunk again
Please God, is a penis possibly making it to vagina town to much to ask for tonight.
Just you wait I'll be crying and puking everywhere in no time
I set up her keyboard so that no matter what she does, it will open up RedTube. Click and command Q all you like, its going to porn. No I play the waiting game
My mom is currently drinking alone in our kitchen singing the Dixie Chicks to herself so, hey, alcohol is forever and we should not be shamed for its use.
Sorry for cyberstalking your dad.
I thought if I bought the most expensive pregnancy test I would look like I had my life together
Fuck this virus. We’re finally back on campus but the bars suck parties are banned sports are canceled we eat in our rooms and can’t fucking hangout with anyone. I’m tired of virtual classes and involuntary celibacy
OMG IKR! It’s not college unless we’re puking in a toilet wondering if we’re pregnant or just hungover!
Randomize
