i'm sick of taking my pants off and seeing a look of disappointment on the girls face. i want her to be frigthened
why did i save someone in my phone as corn dildo?
Believe it's possible to jerk off while watching the food network.
Dude i'm seriously thinking about his nipples.
will emailing you the 64 kama sutra positions I want to try during the 3 days your here turn you on or terrify you?
I fatbooth all their pics then decide which one is the cutest even if they gained like 400 lbs and then proceed to fuck him.
She got stuck in the front door. She never told me how or why.
I understand where he's coming from but I don't want this alcohol to revolve around relationship
Wait
You know what I'm hearing? Blah, blah, blah, I have pneumonia, blah, blah, blah, I'm a quitter. COME OVER AND PUT YOUR PENIS INSIDE ME.
She's like the Jonah Hill of sorority sisters.
I had a dream that I got you so wet that you flooded my apartment
I just got CPR certified, don't make me need these skills so soon
I once broke a mans heart just to get laid by a premature ejaculator
We are totally like Jim and Pam, except ya know, drunk and not together anymore.
She played the piano. I played the piano. She got on top of the piano. I got on top of her.
Randomize
