My cock was attacked by outdoor plants
I don't think brook has ever known best
theres no point in washing my sheets anymore. its always going to be a fine layer of booze and semen.
Soooo my gf got the droid and doesn't have BBM anymore, I think its over for her
I've had enough of this chick, she wanted to cuddle after giving me a handjob. I feel like I'm in junior high
screw jello shots the kids from the culinary school made pudding shots with 4 loko.
I don't know. I was also picked up by the doormen and held over the bar so I could do an upside down shot out of a bartenders tits.
A gay black guy with blonde hair and a gold tooth just told me he would shit on my face.
Now it's a party.
i looked down and was like "oh shit thats blood" then it was like "shit, thats not my blood." then it was like whos blood is this??
He said I could liberate his beef and all I could think about was how I don't eat veal for political reasons.
Plus, I've always wanted to drive in rush hour with a huge cock drawn on my hood
Someone touched my vagina when we were out last night. The fact that it was you is inconsequential and I am still counting it as a pull.
I was giving him a handjob in the woods and a family walked by
After the day I've had, I can't decide if donuts or fireball would be the appropriate priority.
You walked into the frat house and screamed "whose down to fuck" i think they were more intimidated than anything
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