in the bathroom helping her wash cum out her eye. pretty much explains my sex life
My RA just gave me tips on how to have discreet shower sex. Were we that loud?
Drunk lesbians having an argument about their realationship isn't as hot as I imagined.....
I woke up with a solved rubics cube in my purse
I wish! That ended in 2001 when we all got collectively band from the Settle Inn. As a group we are also band from social events at the zoo. It's impressive really.
Just did a drug deal on the toy aisle at walmart, Merry Christmas
I just saw an appointment in my phone called "it's been a month" I think I drunkly did that after I slept with Paul to remind myself to check if I got knocked up... I'm smarter drunk than sober.
No. I'm too high for this. I gotta focus my mind for my future Hooter's interview
I like literally had a visual image of his penis going into your soul
It's a good thing vaginas don't have taste buds
I re-seduced my fuck buddy...must be the luck of the Irish!
sorry I called you to cry about the state of the neopets economy
It's weird having sex with someone you actually like
I don't know if it was the movie or the drugs but after i watched it i wore the same spongebob shirt to school for two weeks and stopped showering
I’m going to lick a fucking door knob when this shit is all over
Probably Waffle House
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