I never noticed this but I have a beauty mark on my labia minora
Please tell me how you discovered this.
I was looking in the mirror snooping around
i may or may not have a boner. what are your thoughts
Dude, we somehow need to leave discretely with the toilet brush.
Package from mother. Contents: Cookies, my old pokemon cards, and condoms. Note: "These have a July 2010 expiration date so give them away or use them with a gal that would be a great daughter in law. Love Mom" Love you too momma
I cant help but love a girl who informs me of the pregnancy test results by emailing me a YouTube clip of Barney Stinsons not a fathers day speech.
I was so drunk. I apparently did a flip over the balcony using it as monkey bars. Ya I hurt a bit today
I need to stop drinking and eating and start working out. I look like the lovechild of John Goodman and Jabba the Hutt.
THIS NIGHT WILL NOT GO DICKLESS
The landlord called, GOOD NEWS! Noise violation #2! Something about people singing and fighting with vodka bottles in the parking lot. Well done us.
You stared at the ground for like 20 minutes willing yourself to get sober
No way hahaha I have zero intention of adding him I wanna just join in on a three some but mostly just be there for moral support and snacks
You gotta have 1 orgasm for me and the rest can be for you. I'm living vicariously through you 😂
By the time I realized I was watching a Danish porno with muppets it was already too late
The box said 94% effective prevention of pregnancy if used correctly but God knows I’m not gonna use it right so let’s adjust that to like a 70%
Getting a lap dance from a girl you went to high school with really isn't as awkward as you'd think
And she called me out by name, nothing could have made it more awkward but it ended up not being that bad
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