the entire time we were hooking up i couldn't stop thinking about the bengals. thoughts?
There are GROWN MEN with fake HP wands flinging curses at me in Walmart.
That's funny. Are they weird looking???
OF COURSE THEY ARE WEIRD LOOKING, THEY ARE STALKING ME IN WALMART. WITH. FAKE. WANDS.
Absence makes the cock grow harder.
In less than 3 minutes we had 3 security guards running after us
You picked a jagger girl up claimed her then walked out the door with her that was the last we saw of you
Naw, the sex dungeon had to come down so we could build a nursery. Cause and effect really.
Still not sure if my open-bar-week-long-trip to Cuba is the best idea as a congratulations-for-my-sober-february-challenge. My liver might just explode and give up.
it is a dangerous dangerous place where morals and dignity go to die and all your fantasies about men become reality.
When did angry sex become our thing?
Now that makes it sound like you had sex with a guy in batman costume and you never took the mask off so you can't 100 percent be sure.
There's always a silver lining when massive voluptuous tits are involved
I wore a bathing suit downtown so I didn't have to put on underwear, I obviously don't have my shit together
he's smothering me... and not in the good, can you move your thigh off my face please?.. way
Just got my LSAT score...if you need me I'll be drunk in a ditch somewhere.
Whoever was the bastard/bitch/genius who duct taped my keys to my dick so I wouldn't lose them. I hate you.
Randomize
