We better get laid next semester cause I prayed hard
I even walked 30 feet with my eyes closed from two love rocks so that we get some cock
It's nice to sit in the library and see the progression from freshman pledge to 6th year coke addict all at one table. Gotta love sororities
He said he had a gf but the monogamy was "only implied".
Could someone please kill snooki before she contributes to the gene pool.
she just took adderol and chased it w dog water
She just said she wanted to get freaky and left the room. I'm almost certain I just heard the microwave.
What's the wine called that we really like and we usually drink it with xanax?
Aj and I already plan to tape our thumbs to our palms so we know how it feels to be a t-rex.
I will call him whatever I please, including flaccid dick on forehead guy but not limited to watermelon cunt head.
I tried to sit on a barstool last night...it was an open trashcan.
donating our bodies to science does not justify what were doing to them.
The creepiest man is serenading me at the bar right now. I had about a quarter of a drink left and the bartender just walked over and filled it with vodka and walked away laughing.
I told him that if he cleaned the bathroom, I'd blow him. You could eat off the toilet. Seriously, get over here. This is the cleanest you'll ever see it.
I didn't think you were that drunk until you were trying to rub your foot on my vag under the table at the thai place.
He’s tiny, hairless and humps my leg when he wants sex. He’s basically a chihuahua
Randomize
