Fire inspection over. Blunts are OK
Can you do me a favor and fuck someone with a car so I can get a ride home?
Also I climbed atop a mailbox with a toilet paper hat and a wolverine claw made of glowsticks, screaming at passers-by that they were going to die. Control me
I'm blaming hurricane Irene if I get pregnant tonight.
That's your penis' name. I've always referred to it as Alejandro secretly.
If he's the sort of guy that will fuck in a public restroom, he's the sort of guy that will cheat on his gf. I'm goin for it.
I picked up a guy that night wearing a onesie. I kicked Xmas' ass
All i hear is "BITCH BETTER HAVE MY HONEY" and i turn around and there is a dude in a bear costume. It was fur real.
Everyone was soo nice and genuine.. Then again it coulda just been the drugs.
I do not love him. There is no love. Only sex and meatloaf.
I woke up naked with a Jason mask on and a fat lip. What happened last night?
i doubt you are even in possession of a crowbar.
I suggest you not find out the hard way
I don't think you could pull off being mean.
How do you think I'm still single?
fyi: first time in five days i havent washed my birth control down with liquor. when are we going out tonight?
i'm not sure what you are doing right now, but i know that i don't like it. whatever you are doing. just stop. come here so we can fuck
Randomize
