so...dinner was kid's cuisine and a bottle of wine. i think they go well together.
Oh, and i love you too. Im just a selfish dick who had to talk about myself first
It summer and it's getting a lot harder to hide sex bruises from my parents.
First world problems?
Thank you, I really appreciate that. I know I couldn't participate in class tonight and I hope that doesn't affect my grade too much. So please let me know of any extra credit opportunities such as fellatio
I found my keys in the basement freezer. Drunk me is a sneaky little bastard.
We went from zero to drunk tank in 45 minutes.
Our first time hooking up was on New Years and we've managed to hook up every holiday since, I'm hoping this lasts until 2016 just to fulfill my American Holiday sex fantasy I never knew I had
YAY! I just removed my own stitches, and I'm only bleeding from one spot! on a related note, do you think a dishwasher will sterilize forceps and trauma shears?
THEY DIDN'T THROW MY PORN AWAY!!!!
I told him no rough stuff and he immediately bit my ass. Who the fuck does that?
I guess she found the pillow case full of vomit I hid last night: "Oh my God. Oh my God. In my fucking FRIDGE?! Really? Hope your dick falls off there's puke all over my food. Fucking die."
I'm fairly sure I accidentally saw my dad naked last night
i'm not sure what you are doing right now, but i know that i don't like it. whatever you are doing. just stop. come here so we can fuck
Who is naked dude in the kitchen?
According to the rule of quantum porn mechanics, the mere thought of something kinky causes it to exist. So out there, somewhere, there is already riddler/smurf porn...
Randomize
