You work out of a Hotel?
It made me feel like I need a reality show of my life so I could go back and watch the episodes to figure out how I got from the trunk of the car to my neighbors tree house...
its a saturday night. im home alone watching legally blonde, eating week old birthday cake and drinking milk out of the carton. so yeah im doing real well
She said her first boyfreind was so small she is still technically a virgin.
I looked at you and you stared at me dead in the eyes then sprayed febreze at your crotch and winked.
Just coat-checked 2 backpacks full of 40's...it was the bouncer's idea.
Note to self glow in the dark nail polish can be quite the mood killer during sex especially when you notice its working for the first time and you stop everything your doing to do spirit fingers
Blonde girl lying face-down, passed out next to my bed, walls are covered in guacamole. College is looking excellent.
I'm so glad I was blacked out while I was going all exorcist in the bathroom. That's so not a memory I want.
No, supporting your unemployed boyfriend IS NOT what credit cards are for.
bought even stevens on dvd and enough weed and pizza bagels to last us a week.. ready to get snowed in?
Well she made a 15 year old cry, the grandmother did an ice luge and I woke up to the sound of sex moans
Thinking about licking your asshole. And hugs and stuff too I guess.
It was after I slept with him he tells me he's a juggalo
Well it was nice knowing him
We're at an agreement where I don't pry and she pretends blissful ignorance
Randomize
