I realized that I earned the name Classy cassie as i was throwing up vodka slushie in my bed with a guy I know by the name extacy boy
I may or may not have melted a dent into the top of my minifridge with my hot glue gun, which I left on for the past couple hours unsupervised, while we were on our salvo/savers excursion. Welcome to Halloween in college.
i have a strong feeling i fucked one of the waiters here...
It's confirmed I did eat a ping pong ball last night...
I mean we've tried to get high on nutmeg, we clearly dont know the definition of "too far"
Its name is Richard. And I think he formally introduced us.
it was a whole new experience in the world of ball fondling
I'm buying drugs in the library...And it's not even finals time. What has my life become?
Currently doing my walk of shame down a floating dock. No more guys who live on a boat EVER AGAIN
Do you think he feels stupid trying to bang girls with his small penis? I'd be embarrassed.
An we can hold bottles of vodka in our hands singing yo ho a pirates life for me
I can smell the sangria seeping out of my pores
I literally have a pirate chest of slutty clothing.
Girl in front of me just swan dove into the middle of the carpeted hallway, stood up, clapped for herself, and then continued walking. My life is complete.
Aiming to get laid tonight but if it falls thru I'm either gonna make a mixtape for my sugar daddy or sew a teddy bear for his newborn
Randomize
