i can't believe i never thought of this: farticle man
i was like the pretty and slutty 8th grade girl who goes to a party, gets wasted, and ends up having sex with a senoir
details?
alcohol + bed + penis = sex
let's bang
You're in my phone as 'Weird Bus Guy' so I think my answer's no.
Thanks for holding onto me so I didn't fall in my pee in that parking lot. You're the best boyfriend ever.
Your friends ate a hole through an entire loaf of bread
we ran out of cups so i finished the night drinking out of a paint can.
I have now slept with people from more countries than Ive actually visited. Can we make this a game somehow? Like foreign fuck buddy bingo?
It involved anal and pop rocks. Tell me how that could have ended well.
Hows the party lookin?
At a live sex show right now. Not sure about the employee party
I just instagramed a picture of an ostrich in case you were wondering what I did with my night
My memory of last night is a delicious blur of tits, ass, and alcohol.
I woke up and found that i was using my computer as a pillow. i had 53 pages of random letters on Microsoft word
So you completely disappeared from my memory last night at about my 15th Jager bomb. But only you. No one else.
You need to get out of there before he falls in love with you.
I'm going to start talking to Bill again, he has friends with boats which means we'll get to go on boats.
Randomize
