I will fuck a handful of worms if you hold them
I had a dream once that juice was flowing out of my kitchen faucet
Just saw the pics you left in my phone. thanks for reminding me that last night was not a dream.
She passed out in the backyard, making "face down" snow angels ... so they could have a smile.
My face is tingly. And my legs are being massaged by golden elves.
Just had sex in an ice hut. What have you done with your holiday break?
I don't remember but we shouldn't have a problem. Unless drunk you encouraged drunk me not to wear a condom.
I think we have a problem.
I guess my vagina missed him because it called and left a 5 min. message. Color me impressed
Keywords: shitstorm, police, jail.
I just want to smoke weed and be the little spoon all winter. My modern day hibernation.
I'm now forever going to blame miss frizzle for making me the sexual deviant that I am today
Just got done being naked and Mooning the cops. I'm still alive. Let's drink.
I’m on my third beer doing poppers in the shower to no doubt
I'm not sure you count what happened last night as sex.
He was literally screaming at me for using the same knife to scoop the peanut butter and the jelly.
Randomize
