is it wrong to smoke out middle schoolers?
yes...dear jesus what did you do?
bwahaha. ask your little brother in about 20 minutes. im dropping him off.
I don't wanna hook up with anyone from minnesota
everybody there reminds me of mashed potatoes... white and lumpy
I envy your ability to put any word in front o the word beer and make drinking before 5 sound like a socially sanctioned event.
He left the bathroom door open so i would hear him masturbate in the shower to make me feel guilty for not putting out but it just turned me on cause i like guys masturbating. weird?
thanks for showing me a good time......and your penis a few times. Thanks especially for that.
if you wouldnt have been fucking me hard and crazy like that then my bed wouldn't have broke. you owe me 600.
so you admit it was good then??
You asked me to be the big spoon, when you passed out on the stairs
I wish the inside of the tampon box said "CONGRATULATIONS YOUR NOT A MOTHER!"
I'm worried I'm going to miss my flight so I set a series of alarms on my phone to act as checkpoints to make sure I'll be there. 2am-stop drinking; 4am-stop fucking stephanie, get some sleep; 5am-wake up, fuck stephanie once more; 6am-get to the airport
Sorry about the voicemail last night, people in hostel thought getting the clap from cheating on me wasn't enough and you hearing a 6 foot 5 Swedish dude bang the shit out of me was needed.
I used to put Bugles on my penis and pretend it was a wizard.
Um, would you be up for dick jousting? Stefanie is willing to pay 40 bucks.
you left the hospital looking like the grudge, your mom and I were pushing you in a wheel chair and you yelled peace out fuckers.
I would pay to watch a Bravo special of you getting Botox.
Went out with the family last night and some 40 yr old lady wanted to take me home. My mom was not happy with me
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