Wow, you were right... Weed does start conversations
I think thanksgiving was created so we could all be thankful that we're still alive after the night before.
I slept face down in the dirt because I wanted to go camping?
i just called. the lady was really nice. something tells me my schools clinic gets a lot of calls about chlamydia
come over after work tomorrow, liz and i will make all of your wildest dreams come true. so long as your wildest dreams involve drinking champagne at my house with two girls who won't have sex with you.
Sitting in the library studying = googling how to get laid in the library.
the cops were hovering over him then shinned a flashlight to the floor above ours, then I realized that some fucker jumped from the third story.
fuck our hall.
Would you and/or him be willing to dress up like the phantom, sing me music of the night and then bone the shit out of me? this is important.
He woke me up at 3 am, turned me on, then changed his mind. There is no way he is getting out of twilight now.
HOLD ONTO YOUR PANTIES AND SAY GOODBYE TO THE REMAINDER OF YOUR INTEGRITY
I got turned off after he said, "i can see us in the future...me, you, and a back yard full of alpacas."
Woke up on the couch with one cowboy boot on and a hat over my crotch. God bless texas.
Did body shots with a guy... Ended up being the ref of my volleyball game... So that's why we won
Mandatory face masks - finally, a solution for lip augmentation failures and bad breath.
I’m not sure she knows my name. She introduced me as “the fuck toy”
Randomize