return my video game
his personality makes his face look like an asshole.
seeing an 80 year old woman puke in the bushes changes everything...
that's spring break in florida for ya
I know I'm all grown up when I don't have to take my pregnancy test in the store bathroom anymore.
It went alright, nothing too special, just got threatened with a knife by our server.
I got offered a handle of vodka and tomato soup to bring his dog home. He knows me all too well.
There is a good chance that the other night after a wedding reception i was at that i mailed you a drink coaster.
Ed's in which sucks about a thousand cocks... But thats 1800 less than working with Alex so it's gonna be a good day
Would it be inappropriate to trade Christmas cookies for sex?
James is trying to butt-heads with a moose. I don't know whether I should stop him or just sit back and watch where this goes.
I think my boss gives me work off weekends because he doesn't want me showing up hungover anymore..
That's the last time I send a mass text invitation to smoke a blunt
This morning I found four opened yet full beers on my desk and my towel rack pulled off the wall and in bed with me
The fact that you walked around talking like Barbie and still got laid amazes me.
I'M CUDDLING WITH MY CAT AND THAT GUY SENT ME A DICK PIC. UNANNOUNCED DICK PICS ARE TERRIFYING AND MY CAT WILL NEVER BE THE SAME
Randomize
