quick I need to know all the foods that the very hungry caterpillar ate
how do u look a man in the eye when u own both his daughters V-Cards?
You told the cops that they couldn't arrest you because they weren't hot enough to fuck
you can add "aspirated seaman" to the list of things your sister has been admitted to the hospital for
i'm so sad bro, I can't get any pussy. I'm so sad
Girl just walked into the bar with a T-shirt that says "I'm not Irish, kiss me anyways." Target aquired.
I swear I can feel something in my uterus. Like, I can feel his sperm searching for an egg. Wtf...
The bartender charged us for drinks. Life is different.
i just remember sliding through the snow and yelling i love america before puking on the oncoming cars
He threw a twenty at the stripper and asked for change
well did he get it
....yes
I'll be the Broncos and you be the Seahawks and you can pound the shit out of me.
So many weird people in this class. I can practically taste their unwanted virginities. They taste bad.
woke up and somehow me leather belt got torn in half. either we partied with the hulk or some chick just could not wait to see my dick. probably the former tho
You know you gave a quality blow job when you have to ice your neck and jaw the next day.
I refuse to take any type of advice let alone love advice from a motherfucker who is missing 3 fingers from a Fucked up masturbating accident.
Randomize
