remind me next year to leave the 19 year old girl at home when you're going to pride. total cock block
Just spent a extra 20 minutes on the phone with the lady from unemployment talking about how to make the best brownies.
maybe next time you shouldn't be drinking alone watching intervention at 3 am and no one would think you needed an intervention.
I dont know how to respond to your rave picture. I mean yeah, he's hot, but it just seems wrong to be like "Please tell me you fucked that guy with the pacifier!"
Ice cream: Good. Fraternity: Good. Eating ice cream off a Skid Row bum's ass crack in order to get into a Fraternity: Homoerotic at best. I quit.
I usually just read books and meditate to an aquatic soundtrack of sea walrus's mating. But ill choose coors light instead
My last 2 google image searches were 'a lot of pudding' followed by 'a generous portion of pudding'
Nah. After about 5 shots he decided he needed to clean the gutters. We're headed to the hospital now so meet us there.
You fell asleep on the toilet and he was like uh should I take her off?
my confident boosted when he told me that it was I who started making out with him. ME. NOT HIM.
I AM SHOCKED AND PROUD OF MYSELF
That is priceless. You walk into her house, fuck her husband and demand Chinese food. Your an inspiration to us all.
She came home, put on the news, left a 20 minute drunk message on her friends machine, then proceeded to play back the entire message laughing hysterically and then just passed out
I'm not sure you count what happened last night as sex.
He has a syndrome called asshole. And it flares up 24/7.
Everything is scary i hate being an adult i hate responsibility tell me a dick joke
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