I dont know whether to be proud of myself for not driving, or being proud that i was so messed up I couldnt drive
the best part was when he threw his debit card on the table, looked at everyone and said "turn this into pizza!" It felt like a scene in a 'coming of age' teen comedy.
Just filled up my pledge keg goblet with coffee at bp. They can judge all they want. At least I'm not killing baby dolphins.
They were fighting, but then they bumped into the bong and it shattered. After that they just hugged and cried.
idk whats worse playing power hour to yourself, or the fact that you were having fun while doing it
Wanna hang out, and by hang out I mean go get plan B... and maybe lunch, but mostly plan b
you were trying to control your nosebleed while having someone hold your four loko while you drank it through a straw. all at the same time. that is commitment.
You insisted we help some homeless guy put up posters for his missing pet alligator so we left you there because they were really just Chinese takeout menus.
Discovered that a nalgene holds an entire bottle of wine. Going mobile. Come find me.
yeah dropping that class because i really don't want to be known as the girl who fell asleep in class and threw up as she walked out for an entire semester
So, when I got arrested, they fingerprinted me. I'm getting my nails done right now and I'm pretty sure he's filing off my prints. Worth the $30.
Right now, I'm sitting in my room, drinking beer, eating double stuff Oreos, taking bites straight from a block of cheese, and watching Anchor Man 2 trailers. Finals week at its finest
Ladies don't puke and tell
That was just an endearing nickname I called you before. I'm not gonna call you a filthy slut now that you are one, I don't want to hurt your feelings.
I feel like you should store your weed in something that suits your personality. For example mines in a hollowed out disney princess book.
Randomize
