I realize that when i start making 24-themed music videos in my head to the song 'love is a battlefield' that i really need to get out more
Id settle for living inside the pirates of the carribean ride.
He asked me to sit on his face, but i didnt, for 2 reasons, one, i had just pooped like 20 mins before sex, and two, this could be my future husband. so i skipped on sitting.
just got my goo swallowed for the first time. colors seem so much more vivid now, and more rainbows are outside
well after this past weeked you can expect to see me on maury playing a little game called "who's the father"
We're going clubbing with matching soccer jerseys on.
What will that accomplish?
It will accomplish clubbing with matching soccer jerseys on.
Things you are not allowed to do while im gone: sell cats on ebay, put cats in freezer again, shave cats like lions, dye cats pink/blue, try to light cats on fire to"wake them up from their nap" agian
They're doing a Bong-A-Thon for 4/20. I don't care if you quit. You are coming out of your weed retirement for this.
My liver is begging me not to go, but sadly enough for him my feet and hands control me getting there.
i want to pour hot gravy all over you in bed
you should probably know that there's a naked dude in your window
i wouldn't normally say anything but you seem to not be there
My general physician told me i have the emotional capacity of a 2 year old, While he refilled my xanax prescription. That's service!
Think of it as a business transaction. That's how I justify all the horrible things I do. Blow my married boss? Just a business transaction.
The guy got mobbed on, all hell broke loose. About 20 cops showed up, and this kid somehow convinced a cop that letting him pee in front of him is justifiable. This guy could sweet talk Hellen Keller, he was THAT good
What's a professional way to say get your shit in gear?
Randomize
