Dude, I don't think I'll ever be able to find a girl for me...
Is this the gay conversation?
I walked downstairs and there were 50 sorority girls. I wasn't expecting an audience during my walk of shame.
He's warming up to shark week, by only eating fish and drinking vodka, and all the time he keeps yelling "death to the seals!"
at roughly 3:30am you called me saying you were gonna start a big game of strip twister in politics class and i was your partner.
Ohh god. I'm so nervous. This is terrible. He just introduced me as "the best girlfriend of his life" and Jenny as his "sexual roomate"
Put cigar in mouth backwards. Plz remind to check for scar in morning, can't feel it now. Screwdrivers are like morphine.
Your French couch surfers have just started playing flip cup with old crow. Basically you need to come back here
How do I tell a friend I drunkenly broke into his house and may have lost his dog
There's no point in calling it Big Titties Tuesday if girls with big tits don't get anything special
I deem her datable let the dance of attraction commence
They said you bought the guy a shot and was talking about being Greek and then all of the sudden just puked all in their pitcher of beer and got kicked out of the bar.
Just had my first american. He tasted like freedom.
I didn't know what to say so I just sent him a chicken emoji
Oh my god I'm in a public bathroom with a space heater. I never want to leave
How do you ask the man who gives you multiple orgasms if he has friends who could do the same for your friend?
Randomize
