im glad we only fight about serious things like the hills and disney scene it
Also how the fuck did i get like 30 brown napkins
just woke up to overhearing her on the phone saying "yeah we fucked last night, that makes 42." should i get tested?
well i fucked her too, so yes.
I almost masterbated to the avatar love scene ha it was so hot
This morning I proved to myself and all the kids on the playground that I can't puke and drive.
We went into lab today and when no one was looking i touched our cadaver's penis!
Brought 2 entire pizzas with to the bar, everyone loves us
Are we going out tonight?
My conscience says no but my vag says yes
Less than a month to go... I do not understand how I was able to put up with a roommate who wears bright green Crocs for a year.
Steve brought 6 joints and 2 bottles of makers mark, Josh shat himself in the pool, and Amy blew me. Hope that extra 3 dollars an hour for working overnights is still worth it.
I've got to stop fucking tourists. If Chicagos piazza is anything like their dicks. I'm moving.
I had to bail out of the tour de Franzia because I have class Saturday morning. Grad school is ruining my life
I will buy you batman underwear babe. I'll make sure you wear them every time we have to adult.
I may or may not be drinking in a church parking lot.
I don't want to hook up with him sober. That's pretty much like saying I love you.
Randomize
